Before I can start this post, I feel like I need to clarify one thing:
I believe strongly in the parenting philosophy of “Your child, Your choice.” I know spanking is a hot button topic, but this post is not about right or wrong. It is simply me sharing a choice I made as a mother, and a moment that changed that choice.
There are several things I said I would never as a parent.
Some were silly, and thoughts of a naive pre parenthood person.
As in: “I will not ever pick my own child’s nose.”
Yep, been there, done that.
Really, I would be blown away (bad pun) by a parent who can honestly tell me they have never done it.
When your infant is crying in pain, and they can’t blow out those boogies…
Or they have stuck something inside their nose…
Or you simply just can’t stand the sight of your child’s rogue booger anymore…
I have picked my child’s nose.
And then there are other more important and serious parenting choices that we all make and talk about prior to our children being born. To be perfectly honest my hubs and I differed on this particular topic. But he was willing to defer to my personal preference in this parenting choice.
I did not want to spank my children as a method of discipline. I feel like only promotes aggression and violence. (*)
So for 2.5 years I have followed this belief that there are other methods of discipline that will get my point across.
That was until the day my son managed to get out of his stroller and walk into a busy parking lot.
Now, my back was turned when it happened. My sister in law was with us at the time, and said, “Squishy first and middle name!” “Stop!”
I turned around and saw him stepping into the parking lot, took a few swift steps, grabbed his arm and spanked him on the butt.
Immediately, Squishy looked up to me, eyes wide, and started to cry. Clearly I had surprised him.
Truthfully, I surprised myself. My son stepped into danger, and my first instinct was to spank him?
Granted, I have “hit” my son harder than that while playing with him. The spank I gave him that day very likely did not hurt at all. But it scared him. And it got the sense of danger point across to him.
Afterwards, I pulled him close, and got to a safe spot. I told him I loved him, but walking into parking lots was very dangerous.
We hugged, he wiped away his tears. I wiped my own tears away.
And as we walked away, back to the store, I think I was in shock.
I just spanked my son…
I just spanked my son without even blinking an eye first…
I just spanked my son in public…
This happened over a week ago now. I am still shocked that this was my reaction. And while I don’t feel that I did anything “wrong”, I am still shocked that my response my child stepping into danger was to scare him with a smack on his tush.
At my home, we do timeouts a lot. My son is 2.5, free-spirited, smart, and stubborn. I get down on his level for deep conversations countless times during the day. I have yelled and shouted before, but never hit.
I believe I got my point across, even when I didn’t know I was making a point. I doubt I will spank again, but I now will never say never.
Have you ever done anything with your child you never said you would do?
How would you have reacted in a similar situation?
(*) This is my opinion – it is not based in fact. I am not saying spanking your child is right or wrong.
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