We have reached the end of another deployment. The day that my Hubs will be returning is within reach. I can count down the hours instead of the months.
And boy oh boy, I ready to be done with Single Parenting! Every part of me is ready for a break. My son is a sweet little Squish, he is by no means a “difficult” child, but that doesn’t mean that doing it on your own isn’t extremely exhausting.
All the choices whether they are small or large decisions are all yours. Every time your child wakes in the middle of the night it is all you. Late night runs to the ER when your child has a temp of 105.5, yep just you.
You sleep when you can, and cry when you can’t. You love every moment with your child, and praise every moment you can get away to breathe.
But the main difference between Single Parenting and being a Single Parent is eventually your spouse comes home. Whether they have been deployed for 5.5 months or they have been on business for 2 weeks. The moment your spouse/partner comes home and wraps you in their arms, you know that rest is in your future, the pressure of making choices for your child is again split, and you are once again parenting with someone you love.
I have had two deployments spanning just less than 10 months total to learn how to deal with Single Parenting. Those 10 months have given me is an amazing perspective into the daily life of a Single Parent.
Single Parents are amazing people. I don’t know how they do it, because let me tell you, it is not easy. Rewarding? Fun? Crazy? Chaotic? Amazing? Lonely? Yes, it is every one of those things, but it is not easy.
When the Hubs deployed the first time post baby, Squish was 5 months old; I had no family in Las Vegas. My mommy friends were newer friends, and had families of their own. I was embarrassed to accept offers of help, and forget about asking for help. By the end of that deployment I was SO.INCREDIBLY.EXHAUSTED.
There were days when I wasn’t sure I could do it anymore. I hadn’t slept more than 3-4 hours at one time. I look back and feel like I missed out on so many moments with my son. Even though I was there, mentally I had checked out.
This holiday season why not offer a full day off to a friend or family member who is doing it all alone. Tell them no is not an option. If they don’t want a whole day, tell them to take an hour to go to the grocery store, better yet tell them to take 2 so they can do some holiday shopping.
If you happen to be a Single Parent, or are Single Parenting and someone offers to help you. Just say yes. I know it isn’t easy to say yes, and harder still to ask for help.
This deployment I was lucky enough to have my Sister-in-law here. She moved out to be closer to her nephew, find new opportunities, and to be there to help me when her brother deployed.
Because of her, and some really great friends; sure I am RIDICULOUSLY.READY for the Hubs to come home, but I don’t feel like I missed out on important moments. I’m tired, but I can breathe. I got out of the house almost once a week just me. It has made a world of difference.
Thank you Kim. Thank you Thursday friends. Thank you Hubs – for doing what you do, the privilege of staying home with Squish is one I am blessed to have. And Single Parents – You amaze me.
So more of a Wordful Wednesday than Wordless Wednesday, but a wonderful Wednesday none-the-less.
Other Wordless Wednesdays:
Emily is a wife & mom living in Las Vegas. The owner and writer at Our Knight Life, Emily loves sharing her two adorable boys and journey through motherhood. Emily has run four half marathons to date and is always training for her next big race. She also enjoys creating healthy recipes for her family and sharing family friendly product reviews.
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Midwestern Gone Idahoan says
That is great that your hubby is coming home!!
Traci66 says
I would love for you to link up to Wordy or not so Wordy Wednesday at
http://traci66.blogspot.com/2010/11/wordy-or-not-so-wordy-wednesday.html
Midwest Elle says
This post is both incredibly sad and incredibly beautiful. I am excited for both you and Squish when your husband and his daddy is home.
Melissa Jackson says
I am your newest follower!
I would love a follow back!
http://www.imlivingthethriftylife.blogspot.com
Thank you!
Hannah says
So happy that the hubby is home for you and Squish! This was a great post, being a single parenting can be so hard! I am so glad that this deployment you were able to have some help and get some time to yourself. Often times as SAHM we tend to forget how important that time to yourself is. It is necessary for ones sanity, so that you can be a good mom, wife, and person! I hope you and your family have a wonderful Thanksgiving!
SmallWorld at Home says
What a sweet post. So happy he's coming home soon!
618mom22boys says
Aww that is so sweet. It made me cry. Sending you a BIG thank you from my family to your for all that you and your husband do for this country!
Alison Golden says
Nice post. I do a lot of single parenting now when my husband travels. It’s only a couple of weeks at a time and the boys are older. I find that now it is actually a good bonding time to be with them, just the three of us and when my husband comes home, he does some bonding with them without me so I get a break. Of course it is nothing like what you have to deal with but I wanted to say it will get better. And thank you to your husband.